Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Upgraded this time!

OK, got upgraded this time. I'll complain to 086 anyway.
The Brazilians want to control the music industry after the invasion. Sounds like a good idea to me.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

One over the System

We're not supposed to use our mental powers to get upgraded, of course, but everybody does it now and then. I was all set to do this when I arrived at the airport late, and had to check in using a machine. We can brainwash earthlings to upgrade us, but fixing machines needs a whole different range of skills. Then I suddenly had a brainwave. I was in 31C, so all I had to do was persuade my neighbours to fall sick or something and I would have a couple of seats next to me. I sat down and concentrated hard. Before long, I heard a gratifying scream behind me, and a large fat man was rolling around on the floor with a heart attack. Of course, he and his wife didn't get the plane. Victories like this give you a little bit of faith.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Economy Class!

"What's this?" I said.
"Looks like an Economy Class ticket to Rio" said 719 smugly.
I'm going to kill this entity I said to myself. But first ...
"And why" I said" when you know that the rules say...?'
"The rules" said 719 "are made by me when 086 is away. And I do not see why Business Class is necessary on this occasion."
I'll kill him. Really I will.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005


Back from Lagos this morning. The Nigerians will play ball - 5000 troops to hold largely black areas, but what they want, interestingly, isn't anything like economic or political benefits - they want their Mafia to control the drug trade. Of course I said yes - why should we care? - but they might have to discuss this with the Albanians, to who 1497 has already made the same promise. They can fight it out while we are on our way home.